City Council votes to reduce downtown speed limit to Zero freezing everyone in place for eternity.

 

In a sudden and unforeseen move Friday morning, the Fairhope City Council motioned to reduce the downtown speed limit to zero mph, effectively freezing the downtown population in place for all of eternity. Several dozen cars now stand locked in place in the streets of downtown fearing any movement lest they be ticketed and fined. Pedestrians who are also subject to the ruling stay frozen in the streets as well. Future historians and anthropologists may one day find the lost community of Fairhope, which they will call "The City Froze in Time", and they will ponder the cause of the fall of this great empire.