A new Mobile OB/GYN will actually deliver your baby under an Azalea Bush!

For those newly impregnated in the Mobile and Baldwin area who want an "edge" for their babies local bragging rights, a new OB/GYN group has got the solution for you! For a small fee, DR. Patricia Cohen and her staff will certify your baby as a Mobilian by delivering the baby directly beneath a local Azalea of your choosing. Some people have inherited old Mobile names or have been brought into old Mardi Gras societies. Well, now you can one-up those people with distinction! 

Not only will your baby receive a plaque certifying the Azalea Birth, but a local priest will anoint the baby's forehead with Dew Drop Inn chili, and hide the baby in a King Cake the first night. They have even started a new tradition that has been trending lately- the friends and relatives of the newly financially-disabled will tear into the King Cake the next morning, and whoever finds the baby has to pay all medical bills.

Appointment and consultations are available now, but booking fast!

BREAKING: Protesters march against Dumbwaiter restaurant, demand it change to Smartwaiter.

At approximately 8am Wednesday morning protesters flooded the streets surrounding all locations of Dumbwaiter restaurant in Mobile and Fairhope locations. The crowd of restaurant workers and supporters were seen in costume and holding signs demanding justice for the wait staff. Talking with one of the leaders of the protest, she made it clear that no waiter should be labeled "Dumb" no matter if it is true or not.

TFI consulted a national historian, David Wrigley, who gave us some interesting insight into the name "Dumbwaiter", and it may not be what you expect. The term Dumbwaiter actually refers to a small elevator-like device historically used in large home to deliver meals. For some reason the families relished in making fun of the small elevator, calling it names, and sometimes physically abusing it. That's how the device ended up being labeled the Dumb Waiter. You can see now why restaurant workers would despise this name.

Some talks between Dumbwaiter management and protest leaders have commenced on twitter, and some progress has been made already. Both sides have agreed on either a name change to HotWaiter, TipYerWaiter, or Seeyoulateralligatorwaiter.

Fairhope's Regions Bank now offering 30 year fixed rate loans to pay recent Utility bills.

With the recent surge in utility bill prices starting this summer, a local bank has decided to help the community with new financing options. If you live in Baldwin County and are one of the many who now pay more for electric and water than for your mortgage and childcare, then this might be a great option for you.  Regions offers a 30 year fixed rate plan at a 3.53% interest rate for approved clients. At any point you can even re-finance the loan to add on your next utility bill as well. You can essentially keep this cycle going for eternity.

Rock Creek, 2020

While it may not seem good financial advice to keep rolling these massive bills up into a gigantic ball of debt, there is a slight chance that some global catastrophe might send us into a post apocalyptic future where U.S currency ceases to exist, only to be replaced by a monetary system of golf cart batteries and pineapple leaves. I don't want that world to become a reality, but a Fairhope "Mad Max" world with tattooed golf cart gangs would make an excellent film. I can picture the hero at the end of the film as he jumps off his flaming golf cart and karate kicks his nemesis right between the legs, and as the camera zooms in on the hero's face he says in his gravely voice, "That's why we call it... the Fruit and Nut district." and he rides his segway into the sunset.

Regions will start processing the loans as soon as March 1st, but has yet to make a public statement about funding The Fairhope Inquisitor's film any time soon.

New tech company unveils new Virtual Reality Mardi Gras experience.

An emerging tech company founded in Mobile announced the release of it's Beta version of a Virtual Reality Mardi Gras Experience. The company, Krewgle, will let users download the app from in website this week, and start enjoying Mardi Gras parades at home on their personal VR systems.

Blake Nguyen, The founder of the company, tells us that the idea came after attending a Mardi Gras parade last year, "I just felt like I could enjoy this much more in my living room, and save time and money from horrible parking." he tells us.  That very night, Blake and his buddies started developing the App from scratch.

The experience uses live Mardi Gras parades from the Mobile area, and to make that a reality it uses a large fleet of drones that hover through the crowds. We personally got to test the App at Fairhope's parade last Saturday night, and it was as realistic as it gets. First, the drone guided us several miles away from downtown, where we slowly walked to make our way to the venue. Our drone made sure that we found an appropriate spot in the thick crowd where we could just make out the tops of the passing floats. What's amazing is the physical aspect of the experience. The company will send in real human helpers to guide you through your experience, slapping you in the face with thrown beads, moon pies, and one of the helpers even urinated on my leg a little. We heard that the Mobile version even has live gunshots right in your living room.

The App is titled VR Mardi Gras Experience and will soon be availabe in the iTunes store as well. We urge you to try the App and help support a growing business in the area. We give the App a rating of 5 out of 5 salted caramel Moon Pies!